Origin of Misfits

Once upon a time long, long ago, there was a wee little beaver that lived in a lush, green forest called Canopy Grove. And, as any wee little beaver would do, he merrily chewed down trees to make a dam on the peaceful, bubbling creek that ran through the heart of his forest home.

Then one day, as he was just sinking his teeth into a healthy, young maple, he realized something troubling; he was stuck. Try as he might he just couldn't seem to free his over-sized, bucked teeth from the grip the tree seemed to have on them. He pulled and pulled with all his might but to no avail. The tree wasn't letting go no matter how hard the wee little beaver tried.

So there the beaver was, stuck in the tree, exhausted, and wanting nothing more than to be in his cozy beaver home.

As afternoon faded into evening, the beaver began to fear he'd never escape this death grip that the seemingly innocent maple tree had on him. As he began to panic, he decided he would give one last whole-hearted tug before all daylight had slowly crept away from the forest. He pulled and pulled with every last ounce of everything that was in him, and even some that wasn't. And then it happened, the beaver went springing free from the tree and tumbled backward on the forest floor. He was finally free.

He quickly scampered back to the safety of his sturdy beaver home, curled into a little beaver ball, and, with a huge sigh of relief, passed out.

The next morning the beaver woke up with a new zest for life. He was alive and well and couldn't wait to get started on all the new projects he wanted to begin. This was such a joyous day. He had been granted the gift of life. As he happily marched to the exit of his watery home he looked down and gazed at his reflection in the crystal clear, shimmering creek. As he stared he was suddenly struck with a horrifying discovery; his two front teeth were missing.

The beaver was paralyzed with utter shock. How could this be, he thought to himself. All the pulling the night before had yanked his teeth right out. As he stood in disbelief he began to panic. What kind of a beaver doesn't have his two front teeth, he thought. He began to think that he wasn't really a beaver at all anymore, but a monster. His mind raced and panic and fear surged through his body. Then, suddenly, his panic turned into rage. He couldn't take it anymore. His wee little beaver brain had snapped. From that day forward he vowed revenge on every living thing he could find.

The beaver charged out of his home and scoured the area looking to destroy anything that moved. Butterflies and dandelions proved no match for the ferocious beast as he brutally batted them down with one swipe of his massive tail. Bunnies and baby deer were sent sailing mercilessly through the air as the beaver darted madly through the forest leaving a wake of destruction in his path.

The beaver was bloodthirsty and there was nothing that could stop him. He barreled through this once placid wilderness just bashing and flailing his giant tail to and fro. He looked like a crazed homerun slugger just smashing anything and everything out of the forest.

He was ruthless and it seemed nothing could stop him. But, just as he was about to reach the edge of the woods, he met a squirrel who was missing its tail. It had been detached by a motor vehicle as the squirrel tried crossing the road, and the squirrel was furious about it. The beaver instantly knew what this meant. Without hesitation he flung the squirrel up onto his back and the two of them went bashing and gnawing their way across the land.

Nothing could withstand the ferocity of this duo. Even political authorities of several small countries such as Portugal and Bangladesh pleaded with the two and gave offerings of money and power, but they weren't having it. They crushed those countries like a couple of tin cans.

It all went on like this until the savage pair ran into a three hoofed billy goat with a beak-less woodpecker on its back. The two pairs joined forces and became a ball of terror just rolling across the countryside trampling, bashing, gnawing, and clawing anything in their path.

As the ball rolled it grew and grew until all the misfit animals of the earth were gathered up into one huge conglomeration. Eventually, the giant misfit ball of madness broke into pieces and collapsed in on itself, consolidating into varies weird new animals such as the giraffe, hippo, and Rosie O'Donnell.